What To Do When Life Is Very Hard | 6 Lessons For You To Cope

Beloved friend,

To be completely honest with you, I’ve had hard seasons in my life. I’ve said those were the hardest seasons, but I think I was wrong. This is the hardest season I’ve ever faced. It feels crushing. It feels like it’s never going to be normal again, and that nothing good can come from so much heartache. But then I remember how the Lord led me through every other season that felt hard and perplexing, tough and tumultuous. He is the same God who can help me navigate these new raging seas.

At the mention of His name, Jesus is able to ease my hurting soul. The way I’ve been able to navigate this challenging season is loving, surrendering, depending, and getting to know Jesus. That’s what has saved my life these past few years. Resting on His goodness, even when I don’t feel good. Resting on His promises, even when I don’t see a breakthrough coming.

I don’t know what you are facing right now that is difficult or challenging, but I know what I am facing, and my eyes are so tired of crying. My soul feels parched for better times. My heart feels faint and disillusioned. But I’m still having faith that even in my weakness, especially in my weakness, the strength of Christ will be made perfect. Sometimes, we find ourselves in the dark so long that we start to find comfort in our eyes getting used to the darkness. But I don’t want to stay there. I want to believe that Jesus’ amazing light is going to tear through the shadows of my soul and heal the wounds that only He can heal. I am trusting that God can still replace my broken heart with His comfort and compassion. I’m still holding to the promise and hope that this hardship will all work out for my good and the good of many. That this pain will have a purpose.

Doesn’t that seem to be what can get us through the deepest of pain? Knowing it will have a meaningful and good purpose someday? I know, for me, that gives great comfort. I’ve missed writing to you. It’s what really keeps me hopeful. Is that maybe just maybe… My pain will help yours. My grief will meet yours and you’ll feel understood and like your suffering matters. Because IT DOES. No matter what you’re going through it is tough out there. And it makes sense that you’d be wondering what to do when life is VERY HARD.

A few lessons learned on coping with very hard seasons in life.

1. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths." Proverbs 3:5-6. I know this might not seem like much, but really put all your trust in the Lord. Sometimes we are going through something that is actually working out in our favor, but it does not feel like it. We need to trust that if God allows it in our lives, He can do something far better with it in our lives than without it. I have to remind myself that what I’m going through isn’t good, but God IS GOOD. And to trust the process of God’s timing, purpose, and the way He sanctifies our hearts. Ultimately, you and I are getting ready for HIS Glory in Heaven.

2. Journal your REAL, RAW FEELINGS to God. He cares about your emotional, spiritual, physical, and mental well-being. Being honest about our feelings and the situations we find ourselves in is super important. Just because it’s growing us in character doesn’t mean it’s pleasant. Often, we want to jump out of hard feelings and distract ourselves. In this crazy world, we have so many numbing mechanisms. Don’t numb your emotional well-being away. Give it to the Lord so He can hear you, give you comfort, and DIRECTION with His TRUTH.

3. Meditate on GOD’S WORD. The opposite of how you want to feel, find that kind of verse in the Bible. If you’re struggling with anxiety, google verses about the peace of God and how to battle anxious thoughts. Write them EVERYWHERE YOU GO. Memorize the scripture that feels most fitting to your heart and speak it out loud so that you begin healing with God’s word. God’s word is medicine to our hearts, minds, and souls. Yet we are all too “busy” to sit and just memorize a few lines that could eventually CHANGE THE SCOPE OF OUR ENTIRE LIFE HERE AND IN ETERNITY. Listen, this is more for me than for you. I have such a hard time sometimes doing this for myself. But it has worked miraculously in the past, and I desperately needed this reminder today.

4. Take care of yourself. Eat nutritious food that is actually good for your brain and body. Take care of your physical body; beauty routines and hygiene. Get dressed and do your makeup, or if you don’t wear makeup, make sure you wash your face and put on sunscreen! Move your body by walking, running, lifting weights, or any of the GAZILLION ways you can move your physical body. This is KEY to your mental health. I’ve been able to stay out of full-blown depression in this season of my life because of the exercise I choose to do daily. It’s more about consistency than anything. On some days, a five-minute walk is all I can muster. Some days I can go for an hour. Some days I just do something like light stretching, but the point is to show up for yourself every day. A little bit goes a long way. It doesn’t have to be “perfect”—no one is perfect except for Jesus. You can also play games, have fun, and learn a hobby.

5. Be grateful and praise God even when it doesn’t seem like you want to thank Him or praise Him. It is a GAME CHANGER in our hearts when we worship, praise, and thank God for the life we have, even with its challenges. Gratitude is a stage for miracles. God knows your frame, so to see you worshipping HIM AT YOUR LOWEST brings tears to His eyes.

6. Don’t lose your HOPE OR PERSPECTIVE. We are made for perfect lives in Heaven. This world is not our home, so we will always be a little OFF. Your hope doesn’t depend on you. It is up to God to give you His LIVING HOPE, which is Christ in you. "If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you." John 15:7

Thank you so much for reading this. It means the world to me that you would find comfort for your pain in the learnings of my own. I love you so much and pray that God heals you and blesses you to the end of time!